There are a lot of people around asking me how to get back together with an ex. But something that is more important is how to recover from a breakup. I wrote a quick little something to help those who truly want to move on...
Now with a breakup, you start to want the person even more. You miss them. You want to fill that empty feeling. You feel attached. It is like weaning yourself off of any addiction. When we are with a partner we have an increase of serotonin. This bonds us. It contributes to our attachment. What many people do not see is that they are soooo attached to their exes that all they want is to get back with them. To them, that person is the end-all, the one, the only one... out of 7 billion people (think about that for a 'sec).
I understand why this would happen. Now to recover from a breakup requires a few different steps. Any of the following things can help:
- Focus on yourself
- Travel. Get out of your bubble and your comfort zone
- Make time for your friends
- Write about it (journal, poetry club, whatever
- Talk to a professional (therapy, friend, anyone)
- Limit how much you focus on them. After about the first few weeks of pitying yourself set a designated time to “mourn”. Wednesday’s at 6p-7p you will allow yourself to cry. That’s it.
Also: You must understand that this is like the grieving process. Which is:
These are the stages of grief and loss. You can begin by becoming more aware of these stages so that you can get yourself "through" it all.